untung99.club: Alia Bhatt It makes me anxious to think whether I am doing right by my baby and work

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“Raha is such a happy baby,” she beams. “You just need to give her a little smile and she will return it tenfold. She’s just starting to find her voice, so Ranbir and I call her ‘cheetah’ because of all these tiny sounds she makes while trying to communicate. Looking at her face makes everything worth it, even on the toughest days. Just holding her close feels so important right now since I know she’s going to grow up too soon and not want to sit in my lap or hang out with me anymore.”

That’s not to say that juggling work and motherhood is easy just because Bhatt makes it look so blissful. Although her position and privilege allow her access to the best childcare money can buy—for which she is immensely grateful—the actor hopes to be as involved in her child’s upbringing as any regular mother would. But consider the fact that she is at perhaps the most pivotal juncture of her career, coupled with the less-than-encouraging history of the Indian film industry phasing out actors who become mothers or age in the limelight, and it’s clear to see that Bhatt is bound to feel like she’s being pulled in all directions. It also doesn’t help that the internet’s self-appointed custodians of perfect parenting keep chiding her to stay home and take care of Raha instead of returning to work. Bhatt reminds me that she studiously tunes out the noise, “but there is still a healthy amount of mom guilt,” she concedes. “It does make me anxious to think whether I am doing right by my baby and work. There’s so much pressure on women to ace both…almost like this old-school dogma that once you have a baby, you have to martyr your career or you’re not a model mum. It’s very important for new mothers to get that time off work to gather their bearings, and it’s equally crucial for corporations and industries to grant them that time instead of writing them off.” Is it less challenging for her because of her star status? I ask. “It definitely is, but I’m always wondering what people are thinking. Do they actually think I’m managing well or are they only saying it to placate me? Even if there isn’t judgement, you feel very critical of yourself. But I work hard at my mental health—I go to therapy every week where I voice these fears. And it helps me understand that this is not something that I will be able to figure out on day one or five or even ten; it’s an ever-evolving, ever-growing process. You have to be able to pick up the pieces of yourself and build anew every day. There’s nothing like, ‘Oh I’ve got it together… I’m coping excellently… I have all the answers.’ No one has all the answers.”

When it comes to the Indian family unit, mothers have traditionally been looked upon as caregivers while fathers are reflexively assigned the role of breadwinners—a depiction further perpetuated by Bollywood films in the ’90s and early aughts. It’s only in recent times, where a working mother has become the norm rather than an anomaly, that the function of fatherhood has been allotted equal heft. Bhatt’s eyes glimmer with the trademark twinkle that appears whenever she talks about her husband. “The Ranbir I know has always been very sensitive, loyal and supportive. But he has become even more sensitive since Raha was born. He absolutely dotes on her,” she effuses.“It’s adorable to watch the two of them together because he’s had to bulk up quite a bit for his character in Animal, so when he carries her, it’s like this giant picking up a little puppy. Ranbir is such a hands-on father at home that it sometimes gets difficult for me to even hold her for a second. And he’s got very unique ways of hanging out with Raha—he likes to sit with her in front of the window where the breeze comes in and make sure she spends a good amount of time looking at the big green plant there. He thinks of her as this earthly sprite. He’s travelling at the moment, so I try to recreate that same routine with Raha because Ranbir’s constantly nervous that she’ll forget him.”

One hour into our chat, I’m still full of questions—as is expected when one is speaking to an actor of Bhatt’s calibre—and each of her perspicacious responses spawns another query in return. But a delicate babble from Raha instantly seizes her attention and I know that our time together is up. My parting question to her, then, is about a different kind of offspring. “Ah, that baby,” she shakes her head knowingly at the ‘nepo baby’ tag that has remained glued to her despite her sincere efforts to shake it off. “The only thing I can do is build a body of work which hopefully proves I belong in this industry,” she says. “I always make it a point to acknowledge the easy start I got at the beginning of my career. And sure, it will get you in the room, but then it’s up to you to work that room. The audience is actually the best judge of talent. You could come from a background that props you up but the audience will ultimately decide whether or not you belong there.” And Bhatt’s meteoric ascent to superstardom is proof enough that she not only belongs in Bollywood but is well on her way to becoming one of its most enduring icons.